This is a list of cliches that were compiled in 2003 by RPG Maker Magazine and the forum of VGR.
The Big List of RPG Cliches
Avoid as many as you can if making an RPG!
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Big Thanks Go To The Following People
From RPG Maker Magazine (RPGMM):
RPG2284/Lord Ixzion (contributed to and compiled Cliche List)

From Video Game Recaps' (VGR) Forums:
Sweet Nanami (LC)
Jeanne Rubbo
Cat Slave 3
misledjeff
NPC 7
Goukisfa
Auron's Girl (AG)
Sailormars obsessed fan (SMOF)
Rynoah
NovaDragon423
RyuKurai0010
Riona Leonhart
Ryan
Mad Ben

The meat of this list was created by these people.

This file may only be on these two sites:
http://www.rpgmmag.com
http://www.videogamerecaps.com


Introduction
Welcome to the Big List of RPG Cliches!

If you have accessed this file, then it's safe to assume you would like to know about cliches.
A cliche is something that has been used so much that people are tired of it. This is usually
because once the original and best idea has been used, dozens of other people use the same
idea, and a lot of the time mess it up. In fact, the word cliche is a cliche, but that's another
story.

This list of 90 cliches is a tool that I hope will educate and entertain everyone on the
good and bad sides of RPGs. Without further ado, THE LIST!



-------------------------------
1. Jeanne's Theorem (a.k.a. Squall and Seifer Rule)
Writers often make the two main male characters fall in love with the same main female lead,
though all the game just SCREAMS that the two stud muffins should be together.

2. TV Rule
If your RPG revolves around a TV show, you're in trouble.

3. Instant Heroine Rule
Any game heroine will instantly fall in love with the main playable character of the game.
If there is more than one female heroine they will all instantly fall in love with the main
character. It doesn't matter how big a jerk he is or how badly he treats them, romance is
sure to blossom. Don't you wish real life worked that way?

4. The Clothing Rule
Characters can never change clothing, no matter how inappropriate to the climate
(Rikku in the snowy mountains) or how many years they've been wearing it (Auron).
The exceptions are:

-If there is a flashback to the character as a child (see: FF8 )
-Uniforms (either school uniforms, army uniforms or uniforms worn as disguises)
(see: FF6, FF7, FF8, FF9, CC, etc.)
-Female character(s) wearing a pretty dress (see: FF6 opera scene, FF7 Wall Market scene,
FF8 dance scene, FF9 opening scene, FF10 wedding scene, CC ending scene)

5. The Love Conquers All Rule
By the end of the game, the male and female leads WILL end up together unless
a) the hero dies,
b)the hero's gay (well, this hasn't happened yet, or
c)the female lead dies. Other than that, it's set in stone!

6. Three's a Crowd (The Ryudo Rule)
If the male lead is torn between two female characters, he will end up with neither.

7. TMHS: Typical Male Hero Syndrome
The hero will be either:

a) cheerful teenager with a tragic past
b) horribly angsty teenager with a tragic past
c) silent teenager with a tragic past

8. TFHS: Typical Female Heroine Syndrome
The heroine will be any combination of the following:

a) a pretty young teenager (usually brunette)
b) the daughter of someone important
c) heir to some kind of ancient magic (summoning, sorceress, etc.)
d) helpless despite her magical abilities


9. The Video Game Patricide Rule
The parents of any video game hero will die, usually before you even turn the game on.
The life expectancy of any video game parent is non-existant. Parenting doesn't pay.

10. The Good Girls Don't Rule
In spite of the fact that the hero's party contains one or more characters of the
opposite sex who are madly in love with the hero, and that the inns they check into
only have one room to a bed, nobody ever gets pregnant. Well, except for the characters
in Lufia II, Quina in FF9, and Grandia. Either pixels don't propagate well, or the hero
is well aware of the short life span of video game parents and takes precautions.

11. Oblivious Townsfolk Rule
Any NPC's in any town will be null of any sort of emotion or fear despite the fact that
monsters are sworming everywhere and a step outside of town will result in their immediate
destruction, evidence of worldwide catastrophe is mounting, or impending doom or something
of the like is upon them. They will not cry, run, shout, riot, or act histerically under
any circumstances unless it is relevant to a the hero (i.e. the hero is preparing to
face the enemy and they are worried for him, or the town is being destroyed because
the hero was not there in time to stop it.).

12. The Subtext Law
Someone's always gay.

12a. Lunar Clause
Unless it's a Working Designs game.

13. Small World Theorem
No matter how many locales you visit, no matter how many countries/continents/planets,
everyone is Caucasian and speaks your language.

14. The Almighty Weapon Rule
The main character finds a weapon at the beginning of the game that is almighty,
and keeps it with him at all times even though the first town you visit usually
has a stronger weapon in it. See: The Albert Odessy on Sega Saturn.

15. The Inverse Inspiration Principal
The better an idea for a game is, the worse the execution of the game will be.

16. "He's the bad guy!;NO!, he's the bad guy! Or was it..."
In any RPG, your characters start fighting "the main bad guy." Then, just when you have
"the main bad guy" on the ropes and you're about to kick his ass, the "real main bad guy"
reveals himself and kills "the main bad guy" to show that he's a real bad-ass.

17. "You....You....LIED TO ME!" Law
Once duped, "the main bad guy" tries to stop the "real main bad guy" from completing
the task that up until this point he has helped accomplished. This usually happens
after the "main bad guy" has collected all four crystals, eight gems, or a box of
Lucky Charms. While trying to stop the "real main bad guy", the "main bad guy" ends up

a)getting killed out-right by the "real main bad guy",
b)knocked of a cliff or some other mountain top, or
c)gives his life to save the hero's party before the: tower, cave, mansion, or the
entire planet cave-in or explode.

18. "Now feel my TRUE POWER!" Clause
All "real main bad guys" have a hyper-powerful "real" form that makes you wonder
that if they had all of this power, why didn't they whack you while you were fighting
slimes and doing 2 HP of damage at the beginning of the game?

20. The "Rose" Rule:
If at some point during the game a member of your party is discovered to have done
some terrible thing in the past, it will come to light in a huge, weepy revelation,
and then never, ever be mentioned again, nor will anyone kick said member our of the
party (usually because they've got the better weapons).

21. An RPG fan's worst nightmare...
Every RPG will go into a nearly impossible, lengthy battle or a two hour cinema without
giving you a chance to save first. This is most likely to happen after you've spent hours
barely defeating the most difficult boss or quest in the game, and just when you have only
ten minutes to get to work.

22. My kingdom for a save point!
The longer it has been since you found a save point, the more difficult the next
monster/boss/puzzle you encounter will be.

23. Henchmen
Every RPG boss monster is always surrounged by an unlimited number of sub-bosses whose
only task is to force you to use up all your magic points and healing items before you
face the final boss, who is usually invulnerable and has 999,999,999 and 44/100th
life points - and regenerates twice.

24. "I shoulda saved at the last save point I saw. Wait! Another one!" Law
In every RPG, save points are located just before every boss. I never understood why
the "main bad guy or real main bad guy" didn't just destroy all of the save points
in the world. Then, when they got into a battle with the hero's party and killed them,
then the heroes would be doomed to oblivion!

25. Three's a Crowd: Remix
In every RPG, there's a boss encounter where you have three enemies to take out. The first
one you take out is always the Healer, usually a pretty sexy demon woman in skimpy clothes.
Then you kill the Death Spell Guy, who usually looks the wierdest out of the bunch. Finally,
you annihilate the "leader" of the group, who's basically could look like the hero of a party,
except he has more manliness and a lot less HP than your hero.

26. The Subtext Corollary
No one will ever notice said gay character's very obvious homosexuality. In fact, members of
the opposite sex will fight tooth and nail to get with that person, and would do so even if
the character in question wore a sign that said "I AM GAY!!!" around his or her neck.

27. Everything's in order...
No matter where the towns and dungeons in the game are geographically located, and no matter
their condition (slum, castle, etc.), the quality of the equipment that is sold/found there
is determined by the order in which the party visits the locations. Thus, the rich and
well-equipped town at the beginning of the game will sell crappier stuff than the poor slum
near the end of the game.

28. Wanna pack a sword or a healing herb?
The tougher the boss monsters, the fewer healing items you will be allowed to carry.

29. *cough*Gamepro*cough*
The worse an RPG game is, the flashier the magazine ads and the fancier the TV commericals
for the game will be.

30. The Get Rich Quick Rule
In most rpgs I've played by about the middle of the game you have got so much gp, gil, gold,
whatever that the hero could just settle down and go gamble with Bill Gates and forget about
saving the world.

31. The Marvin the Martian Rule
So how come none of the main bad guys want to take over the world. they all just want to blow
it up. I guess it obstructs their view of venus.

32. "We have no ideas...and a deadline!!!11" Last Resort Part 1
It seems that if writers are against a deadline, and have no ideas whatsoever for an RPG,
there are always pre-made plots for them to use; and use they do! These are so wonderful
because all you have to do is put them in the oven and they bake up dry and cliche as
hell. See below for details.

33. "We have no ideas, and a deadline!" Last Resort Part Deux
For example, writers would think a plot's perfectly acceptable if it's like any one of
the following:

a)Collect the Four Crystals
b)Collect the Four Crystals before the Bad Guys
c)Collect the Four Crystals before the Bad Guys and Prevent the World from being Destroyed
d)Collect the Four Crystals before the Bad Guys, Prevent the World from being Destroyed,
and Save the Princess

As long as it fits in the above parameters, you're ok!

34. "Bye, Mommy! I'm going on a 'venture!" (The Rugrats Big Adventure)
The average age of an RPG cast is somewhere around 17. This number would be lower if it
weren't for those "old farts" who are barely out of, or almost leaving, their 20s themselves.
I actually did an average for Final Fantasy 8, Mistress Rubbo's favorite game, taking the
main characters: Squall, Quistis, Zell, Rinoa, Selphie, Irvine, hell, I even took in Seifer
and all I get is 17.25. That means 17 and 2 months old! When I added Laguna, Kiros, and
Ward to the mix, being 27, 23, and 25 respectively, I get 19.6, or 19 and 6 months old.
See? "Old farts" mess the average up!

And where the hell are the parents? You haven't been reading, have you? =p

35. "Quick! We must save Kimahri from Seymour! ....Let's level up for a couple of hours first."
No matter how urgent a situation, there's always an endless amount of time for the party to
level up (exception -- a timed event).

36. Mini Games
There is always a mini-game that you have to play (usually the stupidest one) and win in
order to get some of the best items in the game, or even progress in it for that matter.

37. The Magic Boat Ride
Once you gain access to a boat, whenever you go to another port town, even on another
planet, even if you teleported to the town or came by eagle, your boat will be waiting
for you at the dock.

38. Too Much Temptation Rule
If your main character hangs about with more than one heroine, your character
will never end up with the gal you are really most interest in boffing.

39. The Destiny Bond
It doesn't matter what the catastrophe is, a hero is always called by a divinve object,
entity, etc. to save the world. It could be ANYBODY! A rapist, a bum, or a psychotic
mass-murderer could be the key to saving the universe.

40. Forever Swordsman Rule
Why does the main hero have to use a sword all the time. I mean can't people who use bows
be leaders, too?

Response:
Swords have a great significance for the Japanese. A samarai's soul is hs sword and all that,
which is probably why we get ninnyhammer heroes running around in the old west or modern times
or in big cities with swords. The bad guys have more fun, they can use a howitzer if they want.
Then there is all the Freudian symbolism behind the sword. There is something disturbing about
somebody who alway is playing with their sword in public. As for Zidane and his daggers, I guess
he just likes close range encounters. Wonder if that is why P. Garnet started calling herself
Dagger?

41. The Pendant Law
If a character in an RPG has a momento they got from somewhere that seems very unimportant,
then you've got another thing comin', because that [moldy chocolate bar] is probably going
to help the heroes save the cosmos.

42. "Where's my mom and dad?" Subtext
If the main character is an orphan, there is a 99.999% chance that one of the main bad guys
in the game is their:

a)father,
b)mother or
c)Uncle (never an aunt).


43. "I have a what?!" (Family Ties Corollary)
It has surprised me to find out that relatives usually have little use in mainstream
RPGs. In most RPGs, the main character's aunt, cousins, and grandparents are usually left
out of the equation. What happened to the Thanksgivings or Christmases of the past that
they celebrated together? I'd definitely not be surprised if the hero had a heart attack
from finding out that he actually has an extended family.

44. Another RPG gamer's nightmare...
The less time you have to find a save point so you can get to work/school/dinner, etc., the
more frequent lengthy random monster encounters will be.

45. Effort + Perseverance = A Potion? WTF?!
The harder it is to find or earn the easter egg, the more lame the game secret will be.

46. Special...effects?
Boss monsters will always be immune to your best special attacks. What the hell are the special
attacks for, then? Trimming your toenails?

47. Hey, I know you! Rule
There are always six different monsters that look exactly the same except for the color. This
makes more sense in the older rpgs because of lack of game memory, but with the newer rpgs
there's really no excuse for it. I mean look at it from a natural standpoint. How many animals
look exactly the same except for color. Not many.

48. Unlimited Payroll/Kindness Rule
It always seems that bad guys can employ hundreds of thousands of soldiers to fight you in a
random encounter, but they will only fight you 3 at a time. I mean, you could go on fighting
random battles forever and yet you would still be fighting some of the empire's army. If they
sent their entire massive armed forces to kill the heores at once, the heroes would be
overwhelmed and the bad guys would have an assured victory.

49. Plot Twist Rule
There will always be one plot twist that is heavily foreshadowed and thus becomes really
freaking obvious, and one plot twist that comes out of nowhere and is completely on crack.

50. Inverse Emotional Investment Syndrome
The more you care about the characters in a game, the more lame and unsatisfying the ending
cinema will be. The opposite is also true: the more detestible the characters, the better the
ending will be. The end result of this is that if a game has multiple endings, it will be so
excreteable a game you will barely be able to stand to play through it once.

51. Hyphen/Slash Rule
Any RPG that is "melded" with another genre will suck dead meat big time. Action/RPG....
RPG/Puzzle Game.... RPG/Adventure.... The only possible exception might be an RPG/Sex game,
but since SONY won't allow one to be marketed for the Playstation, the world may never know.

52. The Fame Correlary
Any sort of game, RPG or not, based on a popular movie, manga or comic book character, or
other franchise will make outhouse diving seem fun in comparison. Don't play the game, throw
it away and eat the packaging. You need more fiber in your diet anyway and will at least get
some benefit out of it.

53. We must rescue [insert female white mage's name here]! Rule
Well, doesn't this rule speak volumes? In almost every RPG to date, the female white mage is
always kidnapped and must be rescued by the end of the game; sometimes you have to rescue her
AT the end of the game. The only reasons this rule do not apply are when:

a)the character gets killed (FF7) or
b) the character has...*ahem*...."masculine" properties and mannerisms. (Not gonna happen.)

54. White Mage Weenie Rule
If the game is designed so only one playable character can use healing spells/items in combat,
it will be the only cute gal character, and she will be weaker than soggy toast. And the boss
monsters will single her out and kill her in the first turn.

55. Heroes of Might are Right! ...or wrong...?
In any RPG, the characters you control are mainly the heroes. In such a game, a hero can do no
wrong. Wanna set fire to the chapel? Go right on ahead. Just make sure to say there were
"evil spirits" or whatever. Entering into somebody's home? Should you knock? Don't be such a
dumbass! Just bust in there and start taking stuff. They don't mind at all! Want to kill
random animals in the countryside, including super-rare ones like Red Cores or Cactaurs?
Go on! There's no meddling wildlife protection agency. Hunt them to extinction, buddy!

56. The Bad Hair Rule
The hero of any RPG must have big, spikey hair because there are no barbers in RPGs, or he
must wear a hat or helmet with goggles if no spikey hair is available. Presumably this is
so that you can tell your hero apart from all the NPCs in the game, even though he is the
only one you can steer with your joystick.

57. The Strange Accessory Rule
The cute female sidekick of any RPG hero will inexplicably have wings, a cat tail (or both),
a horn or, if there is no strange anatomy available, she'll have "ear tails" that drag the
ground or pony tails that stick out so far she has to walk through doors sideways.

58. The Green Hair Rule
There must be no blonde-haired game sprites! Even if a character is blonde in the anime
cutscenes or box art, the game sprite will have GREEN hair. There must also be one super-cute
character with PINK (not red) hair. You cannot call your game an RPG if there are no cute
sprites with green or pink hair. (I am only assuming this is a hard-core rule you can never
break, since game designers follow it with religious zeal...)

59. The Final Battle
The final battle is always the most challenging part of any RPG. However, we are bound to
find cliches here, as well. It alwasys seems that at least one of these happen in this
epic battle:

The final boss' attack:
a) Can hit 2 or more times in a row, unless...
b) its charging up for a super attack, which is...
c) a move that can:
1)Kill the enitre party
2)Hit the party with every status condition
3)Disable all of your healing magic

While all of this is happening, this your party's situation halfway through
the battle:

a) You run out of Revive items.
b) You run out of MP on a crucial, fate-of-the-world-type of turn.
c) The final boss seals your fate.

I'd say this happens about 60% of the time. The rest of the time you're just lucky.

60. The Ultimate/Ultima/Ultra Weapon
In every RPG, there is a sword of unimaginable power; enough to make every peasant fall to
their knees in terror. In most RPGs, the real bad guy has this weapon. This means it's up
to a band of wanderers to save the world. Now why is it that the heroes can beat the bad
guy? Why, it's because NOTHING that is called the Ultimate/Ultima/Ultra Blade/Sword is
actually the most powerful thing in the world. They go by the name of Omega, my friend! =p

61. The Oblivious Character Rule
The biggest wankers don't ever seem to realize their true nature.

62. The Inverse Interest Rule
The more a game company advertises a particular game, the worse the game will actually
suck. Likewise, the worse the game is, the more copies will flood the marketplace. This
means the you may never hear of the games that are really good, or be able to find a copy
of them.

63. Don't leave home without your...Traveler's Checks?
In every RPG, your character will collect money. That's a given. What's not so clear is what
kind of money. Heroes simply get a mysterious currency that is accepted anywhere in the known
universe. Tracking down an evil king in another country? No sweat. Did you fall underground
and find a looong lost colony of Gleeglobs? You may not be able to speak their langauge, but
your money is still talking. And let's not forget the favorite of going to another dimension
trying to save your precious white magic user babe. As long as you have (mountains of GP,
Gillions of Gil, barrels of nuts bolts, toilet paper, a pound of Mary Jane, etc), you'll be
able to buy the right weapons to save all of [planet here].

64. Bad guys have cool names, so what happened with the heroes?
Bad guys usually have awesome names like Vanyrd DeathClauz and Primordious: Zero. Or even
names you would know, like Sephiroth. But why is it that heroes get the crappy end of
the stick? They have names like Fate, Larry, and Jefferey. Or even names you would know,
like Cloud. I bet villagers would never give you the run-around with a name like Darkside
Monsoon, compared to a name like Tad Weatherby.

65. The Bad Guys are Usually Sexy
Granted, there are exceptions to this rule and Americans may not think so in all cases, but
it's obvious that the Japanese love to try to make many of their villians too hot to trot.
They don't always turn out so well (sure, Seymour is scary and disgusting, but you know
what the Japanese were trying to accomplish there). Don't be surprised when they have
white hair, too.

What's that, Ghaleon? You want to give me a private lesson on how to handle magical wands?
But I'll be out past the magic school curfew!

Of course, my tastes are not to be trusted, since I'm the one with a crush on
Jinnai Katsuhiko...

66. You aren't you...
This is the sad reality in most, if not all video games. No matter how bad you want to
rape and kill the white mage chick before the bad guys beat you to it, you CAN'T! No matter
how bad you want to kick the cocky SOB in the party square in the gonads, you CAN'T! No
matter how much you want to kill the shopkeeper and take all his wares, you CAN'T! Let's
say YOU know right off the bat that the guy who just killed the biggest, meanest monster
in the galaxy is going to BECOME the biggest, meanest monster in the galaxy and shouldn't
be trusted. The PC will STILL stupidly follow the villain into oblivion, at least until
he finally realizes the truth. The only consolation for this shortcoming is when the PC is
actually programmed to what you want to do.

Hell, you can't even voluntarily JOIN the bad guys, which leads me to my next feat of
observing the obvious...

68. Good guys vs. the bad guys
In all RPGs the "good guys" and "bad guys" end up openly hostile to each other. No
"pretend you are friends with the evil ruler, then, when their back is turned, let
'em have it and save the world in the process!"

69. Butterfinger Rule
Once you finally find that secret crystal or open that door or cut off the head of that
dragon and obtain its eye, the villain will suddenly show up out of nowhere and take these
items away, thus completing (or nearly completing) his objective. Doesn't matter if you were
extra careful covering your tracks or if you repeatedly had to backtrack through the dungeon
because you had no idea where you were going, the villain will be there and have been
following you the whole way. And when he shows up, your heroes won't engage him in battle
like they do every other time they meet up with him, thus allowing him to get away.

70. The "I hate to rain on your parade" Rule
Any occasion of jubilance (see: Parade in FF or other important event (like a ritual or
something)) never goes off without a hitch. The ritual to kill the big bad guy will be
interuppted, and altered to be a threat to the planet, or the parade celebrating the
hero's defeat of the last boss will be crashed by the REAL last boss.

71. The "I need milk" Rule
Most RPGs begin in a routine fashion, the main character being sent to fetch something,
to run an errand, or the like. Next thing you know, the world's turned upside-down,
a prophecy is spoken, and you're saving the universe. And really, you don't mind, just
remember that butter on your way back from the Dark Spire.

72. The "Lunar Sucks Bigtime" or "The Game Designers are all Bastards" Rule
Ha ha! Don't you just love it when the game designers inflict monsters on you who are
completely immune to your weapons and items and can only be hurt by magic spells? Doesn't
it thrill you to your core when one of the effects these monsters have is the ability to
drain all the MPs of your entire party to "0" every third move? Doesn't it make you want
to jump for joy when the game designers only put like a total of five magic point recovery
items in the entire game, and you had to use four of them just to survive to this battle?

It was fun the first time guys. Please stop it now.

73. The Steel Body Principle
Unless it is cruicial to the plot, no matter how many times you get hacked, slashed, burned,
exploded, sliced and diced, shot, or ripped open, you arms and legs will stay on your body.
(example of plot point: Barret.)

74. The Pyro Principle
The hero's town gets burned. If none, see next.

75. The Big Bang Principle
The hero's town gets taken care of another way--equally spectacular to fire. If none, see next.

76. The Breath of Fire Principle
The hero grew up in a town that was not their original hometown, or they randomly came
from somewhere and were found.

77. The Sore Thumb Tenet
Villains will have an unnatural hair color (blue, white, silver, fuscia, puce, whatever).
This makes them stick out like a neon sign during a power outage.

78. The Sore Thumb Tenet II
Male villains will usually be pretty boys. If the male villain isn't a pretty boy, it's
likely he isn't the TROO BADGUY!!! or the game designers just decided to be kind.

79. The 'Titanic' Rule
If all the inhabitants of a town boast that it's so well-guarded that NOTHING could get
through, you can bet that it's going to be taken over/blown up before long.

80. The 'Where to go?' Law
If you haven't been told where you're supposed to go next, just ask a random villager.
If they tell you to go to the Forest of Trees, then go there. If they tell you that you
must UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES go to the Forest of Trees, then go there. If they give the
location of the Forest of Trees, then go there. If they tell you that there is a powerful
monster in the Forest of Trees, then go there. If they tell you of any rumour concerning
the Forest of Trees, then what are you waiting for? Head for the Forest of Trees! Rumours
are ALWAYS accurate.

81. We Escaped from Alcatraz! Law
If in the event you are captured and sent to the prison whose reputation of high security
and ruthless guards makes even grown warriors shudder, you'll find some simple easy way to
get out. Afterwards, however, you'll be able to wander freely throughout towns, despite your
reputation of being a kidnapper/assassin/murderer/whatever.

82. We Escaped From Alkatraz! Law 1st Stipulation
In the event that your weapons have been confiscated as a result of being imprisoned,
said weapons and other equipment will be stored inside the prison and can therefore be
easily retrieved. In most cases, the weapons can be recovered even before encountering
any guards.

83. We Escaped from Alcatraz! Law 2nd Stipulation
Much as you may yearn for it (or not), there will be no "prison shower scenes" during your
stay in the slammer, despite the Subtext Law (see #12). This is considered a
result of the fact that characters never take showers.

84. The "Hey Charlotte" Rule
The main character has a birthday and everyone dies in his village, His village is destroyed,
he gets some big power. Anyway, if he does indeed have a birthday, The bad guy will show up
and whomp his ass. Then he will kill everyone and leave the little wanker untouched. Otherwise,
the main character has no birthday. FFT does not count.

85. The "Pilika" Rule
At some point in the game, the hero comes across a young orphan/runaway/abandoned child
(usually female) who will then tag along with the party, not participating in battles,
slowing the team down, whining, crying, drawing the party's attention to the bad guys and
generally being annoying. Unfortunately, you will be stuck with the child for a large chunk
of the game. In certain cases, the child will either:

a) hold an artifact which is the key to the world's destruction/salvation
b) hold a strange and rare power
c) be a reincarnated goddess


86. The "Pahn" Rule
In the event of a party member betraying the team by giving information to the bad guys and/or
joining forces with them, the bad guys will eventually turn on him/her. At this point, he/she
will be welcomed back into the party with open arms, despite being a two-faced, backstabbing
bitch/bastard. In some cases, this character will later sacrifice him/herself for the greater
good of the party and/or the world.

87. The Sephiroth Subheading
The big villain will have a connection to the main character, Being the same person, coming
from the same almost extinct race, Their former commander, their butt buddy, anything that
would make the main character not want to kill them quite so bad. And if that doesn't happen,
someone (read: the Mary Sue) gets captured and will be killed unless you give the bad guy the
final piece of the thing they need to summon Mr. Big unbeatable final boss guy. Instead of
logically looking for another girl and forgetting about her, you be stupid and do what they
say. Otherwise they killed someone close to you, like *gaspp!!* your FATHER?

88. The "Hey! My ass looks too big! Now I feel like taking over the world! Raaaar!" Rule
Any overweight/ugly female character (basically any female character who isn't physically
flawless) will turn out to be a psycho who is hell-bent on world domination (example: Brahne,
FFIX). Exceptions: Overweight/ugly female characters who aren't psychos are generally
unimportant to the plot (example: Barbara, Suikoden II)

89. "Pity the Foo'!" Cliche:
Villains who have the physical build of a monster truck will have some quirk that
will make them the world's biggest pansies.

90. "The Smallest Things..." Rule
That small, shining item you pick up, while believed to be unimportant, will help you
big later. You picked up a toothpick? Don't you DARE throw that away! At the end of the
game, you'll discover it's the Toothpick of Destiny and it'll destroy the main boss with
psychodelic strobe effects and glitzy graphics.

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Well, that's all of them. I hope you enjoyed yourselves.

Cliche List compiled by RPG2284/Lord Ixzion
2003