The Gnasher Opens Up,
for no apparent reason other than just for the hell of it.
<br>
<br>

Before anything, I'd like you to read <a href="http://www.rpgmmag.com/forums/viewtopic.php?t=2645">this</a> topic, and then <a href="http://www.rpgmmag.com/forums/viewtopic.php?t=5727">this</a> one. Realize that the second one is not a work of fiction. Notice how the time gap between those is of almost two years. Now make the connection between them considering that the subject of both topics is the same person. Got it? Good.

These past few days, my cousin has been mad about dragging me away from home to do something with her. Today I finally agreed and we went to the cinema to watch Kite Runner, the movie. Now comes the Thing. The Girl is one of my cousin's best friends, and thus they usually go out together (which is how I met The Girl in the first place). And she was there at the cinema, and I was there, which means that for the first time in over a year, we were hanging out together.

When I talked to her, my heart accelerated. When I looked at her, my brain accelerated (and went into 'ohshitohshitohshitohshit' mode). A lot of time has passed since we hanged out for the last time... looking at her made me think.
She's cut her hair shorter (not short, shorter).
Her face is cleaner now, she's looking much better.
After her 6-month trip to Germany, she came back terribly fat and looking like an inflated hippo. Now she's lost the extra weight again and is back to normal, i.e. wide hips but not fat.
Which means, she was looking Hot as Cluck in a bright light-blue T-shirt.
She still can One-Hit-KO me with her smile.
She still is stupid and slow as hell.

You know how there are certain things you look for in a girl's appearance? Some guys like butts, some like breasts, some like blondes, other brunettes, etc? So, yeah. My biggest problem with her is that if you take her looks and try to match it with my preferences, everything fits perfectly, like a jigsaw puzzle. She has got what I like, and not so much of what I don't care about. Push that to the extreme, and you have a girl that, to me, looks... perfect.

And there's the big deal. As much as I'm over her, she always makes me go 'HOLYMOTHEROFCHICKEN!!' in my head when I see her. Because no other female in the whole world has struck me in the way she has. She doesn't look like a General Dream Girl, she looks like the Girl In My Dreams.

You could classify this easily as 'physical attraction', but it's not just that. There's a little something in the psychological department, too. It's not a matter of personality, because I don't like hers. If I believed in aura or spirit or soul, I'd say I like hers. To speak in 'esoteric', I like the energy she has.
Her smile can make my heart go make a trip to my stomach, that's what. But I can't say I like her, because I don't, anymore.

There's no doubt she still has some effect on me... last time I met her, I wrote Letter to a Friend. This time, I'm writing this.
I got over my feelings for her, but then again, I have not.
More than anything in this world, I wanna have her – but then again, I do not.

Summarizing: Every time I see her, I get somewhat sad, for two reasons:
a) She is The Girl In My Dreams, and don't like her. It's a waste.
b) I start thinking about her again, and that makes me mad because I hated it when I really liked her.

<br>
<br>
Yeah, it's a paradox, I know. But I guess that's how it works.

If you don't like her, she is not the girl in your dreams. She just looks like her.

You're in lust only.

You've said it yourself:

Girl is dumb.
Girl is slow.

How is that relationship material? You would forever be dragging her dumb ass out of sh*t.

No, all you want is a f*ck outta her. Which is not bad. But don't cheat yourself by getting into a relationship with her.

Jack off and leave her alone, with her stupid self.

lol.

ignore Ixz, seriously. You're not him.

*shrug*

Furthermore, i doubt that you were really looking for 'wise' words, from Ixz, Bo or anyone. I can understand why they started offering up their analyses, though; wanting to be wise is a very human foible.

Irony's a b*tch though, man. Hope you work it out.

[spoiler]on a barely related note, i guess there's a difference between what's right and what's safe, and being irrational sometimes makes more sense than being otherwise. that's hardly 'wise' of me, i know. =P though it is in a sense ironic. I couldn't resist either, you see. kekeke...[/spoiler]

If she treats you like crap at ALL, drop her ass and any notions of doing her or dating her. No feminine asset is worth mental trauma of being with a dumb b*tch. There are other women out there whom you may have never met that may carry qualities you may love even more- and perhaps even bodies to go along with that.

I say this from what I see go on on this side, and from what I'm seeing in relationships among my friends. I HATE how one girl treats her boyfriend in my circle, like a whipped shell of a man who can only do things when she says, and she cries otherwise. He liked how she looked last year, and honest to God said her boobs were an asset in dating her. I respect his honesty! Nothing wrong with that, but she's a damn succubus. Now she's getting fatter than me, too... that's TERRIBLE in my opinion. But her personality sucks too. God, playing the victim has never been more powerful. Makes me wish I was single so I could just observe the effects of playing with "man putty".

I doubt you were looking for Regal to tell you what he doubts you were looking for.

However, let's clarify. Did you not want us to respond?

@ Metaposting Issues: Of course I wanted you to respond. If I didn't, I wouldn't have made a whole topic about it in the first place. I want input from you guys. I'm not Ix, but then again, I'm not everyone else, I'm just me. So the only one I should listen to is myself? Nah, I don't think that's a very bright idea... =P
To clarify, I want people to respond with their opinion. Respond like you would respond normally. It's a forum, for crying out loud. How else could you act but like yourself?

@ Bo: I don't like her personality, which is to say I don't like her content. But I like how she looks, and I like the way she expresses her lack of content. That's 2 out of 3, eh? 66% liking is more than half liking.

@ Ix: I agree with you, to some degree. She is not relationship material at all. I've witnessed what she did to one guy already, and they weren't even dating (formally, I mean). She's basically an Insane-Man-Making-Machine.

@ Fay: She doesn't treat me like crap. We don't have a relationship. We had a pretty strong friendship one once, but that was over a year ago. To her, I'm her friend's cousin, and to me, she's my cousin's friend.
I agree that there are tons (literally) of other women out there, it's just that I suck at finding them. I know, it's a lame excuse... but it's true.
I know what you mean. Most of the times I go out with my cousin, she's with her female friends, and honestly, witnessing the female side of things is a task only for the strong-hearted.

@ Regal: ... Heh. I could ignore you because I'm not you, but I decided against it ^^ I'm not looking for WW (Wise Wordsâ„¢). Who knows, perhaps one day I'll even understand what you meant there in the spoiler tags...
Heh.
[spoiler]Even though you can pretend to be wise using words I've never heard in my life >.< (damn you, now I have to look up 'foible' in the dictionary).
On a barely related note, I didn't know people laughed on-line with k's outside of Brasil. Weird world...
EDIT: "2) Fencing - the weaker part of a sword blade, from the middle to the point. Compare with forte 1." HAH! I doubt you knew that.[/spoiler]

rofl. i wasn't talking to him, i was talking (albeit obliquely) to you guys. Do you think your wise words will change his life?

Lol@j00 if so.

and i used 'wise' in inverted commas in place of 'presumptious, one-dimensional and perfectly natural under the circumstances'.



@TG - you can listen to as many people as you want, but at the end of the day you're the one who'll have to deal (or not deal) with how you feel. And look at how you're responding to posts; you're simply comparing what everyone says to your own opinions. Lots of words, but is any of it actually helpful?

I enjoy the beautiful pointlessness of asking people who know only a part of you to offer up input regarding stuff they know barely anything about.

^_^

and i did fencing for a bit, a while back. For my DofE Silver, i believe. Hence i did already know that second meaning. Kekeke indeed.

*cough cough* but anyway back to topic

^ And, not surprisingly, you're right.
But!
I'm not looking for advice. I don't want any help because like you said, in the end it's my problem and no one else's. I just want to hear people's thoughts about this. Just want to know what people have to say. Nothing deep or 'pointful'. If you absolutely need a reason... how about curiosity?

I thank everything I believe in (which isn't much, but still) for the fact that not everything we do needs a Point.

rofl, yep. you're right ^^ and i certainly don't need a reason.

I just couldn't let all their presumptions go uncommented on =P

i'm a terrible person ^___^

From what I can tell... it seems like she isn't going to budge. Nothing past friendship. Reguardless of what you do or how hard you try, it'll pretty much be up to her. And from what I've read, it seems like she is just not going to settle.

So all that's left is to do what you can to make the most of it. But that can be multiple things. If you still care for her so much that being around her hurts... put some distance between you. If you are perfectly fine being around her and honestly enjoy her company, then do that. But in both cases, she's still not going to court with you.

This might be a bit pessemistic... but don't expect the unexpected. Be happy for what you have. If anything does happen, it'll be an unexpected blessing. If nothing happens... you don't lose anything assuming you've come to terms with it.

Don't know if that makes sense or not... so feel free to disreguard it.

Might as well kill yourself. It's more romantic. Oh, and John, you presumptuous cockswabber, you might as well do it as well, but more out of pity on the world than any higher idealism.

i chuckle at you.

to be honest, if the world is unable to laugh at a good bit of irony i'm uninclined to do it any favours.

and i don't think that commenting on the obvious presumes anything terribly irrational. call me crazy. or a cockswabber, if it floats your bizarre dinghy.

Pah
Who said a thing about ration?
I just told you to kill yourself.

I used to worry about you two, but y'all have a Batman/Joker thing going on, so I'ma let you do battle.