I told most of you guys in google hangout that I"ve moved in with Thutmose, but for those that haven't heard the reason why is that I was under an abusive situation with my mom. The situation was ultra controlling and manipulative. I wasn't able to do anything about it until now.

I've been home-schooled for almost all of my life, so in real life I couldn't make any friends. Making friends through work was a no-go because I haven't been able to land a stable job. Even if I had a stable job, my mom would probably have tried to prevent me from leaving through further manipulation. She deliberately isolated me from everyone, and I even tried talking to her to see if maybe we could try to come to some kinda resolution. That didn't exactly go over so well. The situation was so controlling that I couldn't even be allowed internet access. I actually had to go behind everyone's back and keep secret the 3G and 4G modem I bought just to have some kinda outside contact. I'm so lucky Thutmose offered me to move in with him. If not, I'd still be stuck back home.

It all sounds pretty crazy, and I definitely don't deny that. It was not a normal situation by any means. The abuse didn't just happen to me, but my entire family. I have a 44 year old, a 33 year old, and a 21 year old brother still living at home (I'm 23, btw). My 37 year old sister used to live at home, too, but was kicked out because it got to the point where my mom couldn't control her anymore. The sad thing is that she's now falling right back into her grasp a year later despite now being married.

So, at this point it's me trying to just stabilize myself in my new situation. Thutmose still needs to give me a key to the apartment, and once that happens I can start looking for a job. It's only my 4th day here, but I'm hoping I can settle in pretty quickly, and hopefully not rush things too quickly either. But once I get a job I hope I can start going to college sometime after. The only snag is that I applied for FASA and found out I need my parent's tax information until I turn 24 (which isn't until August).

Regardless, I'm trying my best to move forward. It's not going to be easy, but I'm gonna try my best. I gotta long road ahead of me but I'm confident with the support from Thutmose and all of you guys behind me I can do it. I'm not saying you guys are the only thinga I'll ever have, but I consider you all my friends. Real life or not, you guys are the best friends anyone could ask. There was a reason why I stuck around, and you guys have proven to me to be good people. I have to thank Ix for creating this forum, and the rest of you guys for being awesome people. Maybe I'm just being overly emotional, but the Mag has been the most positive thing is my life for the past year. If it wasn't for all of you, I wouldn't have gotten this far.

I want to thank the community, and Remeer and his girlfriend for helping me realize my situation. Most of all, I want to thank Thutmose. THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR BEING THERE FOR ME! Dude, I know I just got here, but want to tell you that you're awesome. Thanks for helping get this far, and I just hope I can repay you some day.

It's interesting how a small online community can `have such impact on people. I haven't be around that much lately but I just can't leave for good (I've been still dealing with some of my own issues) I love you all too much
Anyway, back on topic, glad to hear you decided to take a new, hopefully healthier direction. Sometimes it's hard to see ourselves out of certain tight spots until we take that step out. (or someone pushes us out of that spot)

I'm so glad you're okay Navane. I had no idea how bad your home situation was.
That level of mental abuse and control is insane. I am very glad you're away from that.

I had a pretty crappy situation when I was a youngin' with my home life. I won't go into super huge details, but I was never so glad to go to college and escape it for the most part.

So, with that considered- Thut, you're the man.

And Nav, I hope you feel better. Waiting til you get a bit older should be a small hurdle to getting college ready- perhaps just try stretching your legs for now, and really considering what you want to go into. You have the advantage of being older and having some time to mull that over.

I remember reading about your house situation before, I'm glad you're doing okay. Welcome to Cali

Now Navane has a tight spot for Thutmose to get into... >.>

Jokes aside, I'm glad you got out of a bad situation. Most people can't leave because they fear the ramifications of their choice to do so. Sometimes they think they're obligated to stay. It's a bad situation, but you overcame it with help. Good on ya, mate.

Thanks, I appreciate your concern. I'm glad you managed to get out of your abusive situation, too. It sucks big time when people have to go through it.

Thanks, I did feel really guilty at one point. It took alot for me to get out of thinking that. I realized that I shouldn't be held responsible for choices my family made for themselves, and I realized there was nothing I could do to fix it. If I stayed I'd just be "going down with the ship".

I wish I could help my brothers and sister. It hurts so much knowing what my mom has done, and it hurts just as much knowing that I can't save anyone else.

Thanks dude, next time lay off the sake.

-huggles- I had no idea. :[
Positive thinking and much luck from Bonz.

If your mom has managed to keep a grown ass man the age of 44 still stuck at the house, she's some kind of wizard! Not sure how you can go almost half a freaking century and still be living with your mom. Whatever she was doing specifically, it must have been pretty messed up to brainwash someone that bad.

Really glad you're out of that situation.

My mom would manipulate us through guilt. If we'd do something against her will her go to thing would be, "It's my house and I'm the mother. I've cared for you my entire life and gave you everything I possibly could." Then if you pressed the issue she'd start crying and say you didn't love her. Almost every day she'd go on about how "evil" people were and the only thing you could count on is family and blah blah blah. It was total BS and she did that to us our entire lives.

My oldest brother is manipulated so bad that he's pretty much an extension of my mom's arm. He's lost his free will to think for himself over the years. Like I said, I wish I could help the rest of my family but they've been conditioned to only listen to what my mom has to say. In fact, my dad is probably the most abused person in the entire house as she's again conditioned everyone to hate him. She broke him to the point of depression and the only thing I've ever known of him was to come home from work and sit down in our basement and never talk to us. That's how bad she's controlled us.

I really wish I could say what she did was out of love for us in her own sick and twisted way, but I'd be lying to myself if I really believed that.

UGH. This happened whenever I raised a legit issue with my mom at one point. I kinda thinking though, from what you've said it just sounds like she needs help. That's not to say you are in the wrong in any capacity- you do not have the resources to deal with curing what looks like a deep form of depression to me. I mean, it sounds like something is fundamentally wrong. For mine... I let her fall to the bottom. She actually took out fraudulent credit cards in my name, and then put me into a decent amount of debt. Y'know, the thing I spent time avoiding in college despite the many credit card promotions and whatnot. After that, I stopped talking to her for a long time. My sister left for college. She has finally cleaned up her act and depression(she legitimately probably had a shopping addiction to give highs for being depressed, and I have done similar behavior before when I was feeling bad... so I try super hard to be more careful about that now). Hopefully, one of your older siblings will take the initiative on maybe trying to steer her right eventually, because as one of the little guys- you deserve to get a chance to live life. Absolutely.

And the whole family is LIFE thing... my girlfriend has that problem right now with her mom. And we're paying for it sincerely since that side of the family is legit horrible and taking advantage of a sick woman. And then that threads down to my girlfriend, then to me because I earnestly sap emotions like none other and get pretty angry. Yes, family is important. I do agree there. But not all family is created equal. I used to have a creepy guy friend that tried to guilt me once with, and I quote "You must not be that close to your family, to go to college 3 hours away". Dude was tripping. Sometimes, you gotta take off and spread your wings. And family can still be there just as much. And my golden rules- friends can also be family, and also- if someone in your family irks you, you can love them from respect, but you don't have to like em.

I'm glad you were able to get out of that miserable situation. I wish you good luck in the future, especially having to live with Mose.

Wow, I didn't have such issue with my blood family, but I was surrounded by people who used guilt to manipulate in a church I went for 8 years. So I know how it feels. When the church leaders realized they couldn't use fear anymore to make me do what they wanted, they kicked me out. And then they tried to make me feel even guiltier by saying I turned my back on everyone. These situations can be hard, mainly because other people that are still being manipulated will not take your side.
And I know that hurt me a lot since I wanted some of my friends (or as Gotye would say, people I used to know) to understand what I was going through.
Anyway, it's good to see you are out of that already and have people that support you. That in itself is a HUGE step.