If by the end, you've lived your life the way you wanted, would you be happy?

I have friends, I have games, I have this site, and a job. I guess that's generally what I need.

This is what I do, and I don't regret a day I've been here.

I will never do everything I want to do.

I've had several days in the past where I said "if I died today I would be fine because I've had a complete life and have done all that I really wanted to do". Now I don't think in those terms. I simply say, am I happy now with what I am doing and if so, that is all that I am concerned about. If not then I figure out what obstacles and demons I have keeping me from said happiness and I gain a sense of happiness knowing I'm working toward it and that's it. But if I am not happy I admit that. In other words I am only concerned with future happiness as an object in my present happiness but that is continuous happiness. It doesn't matter to me what my last thought before dying is because the next moment it will all be over.

EDIT: @Ixzion, to answer your question plainly yes, all I need for happiness is to live it the way that I want without having to obtain anything in particular (like a house, marriage, kids, being filthy rich, or getting known for something, etc.) but it would not make me happy to wait until the end of my life to ask myself if I have lived the way I wanted or if I am happy. I guess that's why I am struggling to answer your question. It makes me happy to ask myself those questions everyday.

Not until I travel the world. A dream of mine.

few people in life find contentment. even if you set impossible dreams and somehow manage to beat them, you still feel like setting even higher sights.


its interesting because this topic is at the heart of my game crystal shores. do you lament life and regret the paths you did not take or do you accept your choices and go forward? ask yourself one question: have you lived your life fully to your own credo? if you have answered yes, then most likely you are to some degree satisfied with your life.

no mater who you are, you will always feel the pull of what could of been or what failed to materialize. this is part of the human psyche, how we evaluate life - by comparing it.


so am i content with my life? currents no. there are aspects i wish to change, aspects that im glad are as they have been, and aspects i hope will stay the same for the short term.

Neo: Choice, the problem is choice

In my RPG project, I'm always revising my work. Fixing things here and there, improving other aspects and always striving to improve the final project.

I imagine the game of life is the same thing. Even when the whole thing is said and done, I'll be thinking of ways it could have been done better, mistakes I made.

Let's be freakin honest. I love my girlfriend and I don't want to do anything to hurt her, yet I really wanted to hit on these girls at the bar today but I didn't out of respect for her. Do I regret my actions? No. Am I happy? Hell no.

So who gives a shiz about regret? It has almost nothing to do whether you are ACTUALLY happy or not. Just because you don't regret something doesn't mean shiz! It is simple. Ask yourself RIGHT NOW. Are you happy? That is all that matters. PERIOD.

To answer the original question, yeah, I would probably be happy. There might be regrets that it couldn't last longer, but otherwise, I'd say life was a success, time to move on.

Is that how I currently feel? Well, no. Slayers' Reign is pretty high on the "to finish before I die" list, you see. If I woke up in the afterlife tomorrow, one of the first things I'd say is "GOSH...DARNIT!" Yes, with the pause. That's actually how I say that.

Sorry Ixzion for my aggressive (and buzzed answer) last night.

However, it does bring up a significant issue. You asked about living the life the way one wants, but I am living life the way I want in a sense. I don't want to hurt my girlfriend but I do want to have physical relationships with other girls. One could say I am not living the way that I want but that would be inaccurate. At this moment right now (and this need not be the case for tomorrow or anytime in the future). I would rather be with my girlfriend and suffer not being able to have physical relationships with other girls, but it still is bad enough that I am not happy. So living life the way you want has to be qualified. Sometimes we live the way we want to within limits that we don't want. So just because we are living the way we want within the limits of reality, it doesn't mean we are necessarily happy. So maybe I am changing my answer. I don't have any regrets about being with my girlfriend to this moment, and I choose to do it because it is more what I want than not doing it, but I am not happy. So maybe the answer is no.

I'm generally happy, but there's still some things I have left to do.

Once you have all you want, you should start working to be better at having all you want.

Hmmm... I kind of agree with Bo in one point. There are things that I might want, but wouldn't do to not hurt others. Maybe I wouldn't be as happy as I could have been doing it, but I guess I can get a sense of satisfaction, for not hurting anyone.
(I hope that makes sense)
While I haven't achieved many things I wanted to by now, I feel happy that I'm still working to get them, and have not just given up.

Not for me, not yet. I have a list of things I want to do, yet. I think I'll just keep coming up with more things as well...

You people are so freakin young. You don't know what you want yet. I'm too buzzed so I'll spare you. Suffice to say that you haven't even begun to live your lives.

You know, I frankly don't give a sh*t about your adult advice and "adult knowledge" or whatever else, Bo. I really don't. Haven't begun to live our lives? What gives YOU the right to say that? There are younger people than us that have probably experienced more sh*t and lived a bigger life than we could imagine (in a negative way). And stop using that you're buzzed as an excuse for ANYTHING. You do it all the time. You could be a man about it and just say it.

You want to debate every little damn thing, argue ever little damn thing and pick at every little damn thing. One cannot vent, state an opinion, or say anything without you coming around and spraying all kinds of sh*t and debating about it.

Ha, you're awesome, Bo.

I think what Bo is trying to say is that we haven't even begun to scratch the surface of life at our ages. There's going to be a lot more crap going on once you become older and begin to lose your youth. That's to say you don't die early.

Okay, let's get an important detail out of the way before I begin. I'm going to be speaking in broad generalizations here, so let's acknowledge it and keep it in mind as we proceed (three words: grain of salt). I'm also going to be speaking from personal experience, which means absolutely dip to you because your experience is different from mine.

I'd say that people don't really start to grow up until they hit 30. Or maybe 35. The 20s and perhaps early 30s are a time of gaining real life experiences, learning things the hard way, getting crapped on by others, and figuring out who in the **** you really are. Now what does this mean for those of you who are in your 20s and are no doubt gnashing your teeth and cursing my name at this very moment? It means that you don't yet realize what a complete and utter moron you are. Until you can look yourself in the mirror and say to yourself, "Gawd, I am a total loser!", you are a moron. It may happen sooner or later for you than it happened for me. But realizing that you suck is the first step on the path toward wisdom and peace.

The wise man says "I know nothing."
The fool says "I know everything."

During your teens, you think you know everything. You think you've got life all figured out. You think you're God's gift to the world. When you hit 20ish and start realizing that you don't know crap, it's a big blow to suffer, but you struggle against it. You don't believe it's so. The 20s are an "age of discovery", and the thing that's being discovered (if you're lucky) is that you suck. You don't know squat. You've got nothing. You're a joke. Possessing the introspection to realize this makes you stronger and wiser. This "age of discovery" extends into the 30s, when you begin to learn more and more about how much you suck, and then we arrive at where I am right now, at almost 40. I have no doubt that there are people in their 50s and 60s who would scoff at me and say that I still have a long way to go. That's probably true, for I'll be better off at 50 than I am right now (in terms of wisdom and experience gained).

Now this process may be stunted for the current generation because the current generation has been raised with bad parenting resulting in a much inflated self-esteem. Back in the day, we were afraid to hurt our kids and put 'em where they belong. "Spare the rod, spoil the child." Now we've got an entire generation of 20-somethings who think more highly of themselves than they should. It's gonna take more than the usual spate of life experiences to put 'em where they belong because they just dismiss things and say "You're stupid; I'm in the right."

Now what does all of this mean for those of you who have managed to read this far without slapping the mouse on that "reply" button and angrily lashing out at me? Does it mean you're stupid? Does it mean "you suck because you're not as old as I am"? The answer is a resounding "No!" It means, unequivocally, you suck whether you know it or not. If someone had said all of this to me when I was in my 20s, I probably would have scoffed at it because I was a moron back then. I shudder when I look back on my life because I was a ****ing moron at age 20, and that continued into my 30s until I eventually realized what a total ****ing moron I was (probably still am ("probably"???)).

The trick is to realize that you suck. I feel bad for those who don't.

As for living life and being happy with oneself, it's all relative (what the hell does that even mean? I hate saying something like that). There were times during my 20s and 30s when I was very content and happy. It's not all an upward climb. Each time you "gain a level" through experience, you feel like you've "arrived". This is true, but you've arrived at one level with many more to go. I say this as someone who knows he has more levels to gain.

Something to keep in mind and put this matter into perspective is that your body is, at this very moment, in the process of dying. It just takes a long time to die. When you're young, you're a moron who's full of energy. When you get older, you're still a moron (but at least you know it), you're a bit wiser and stronger, but you're inexorably closer to death. It's the ultimate Catch 22. Young people have health and energy but are lacking wisdom. Old people have wisdom but are lacking health and energy. No matter what, you're screwed. Cest la vie. Enjoy the youth while it lasts.

Finally, I'd like to point out that I was "buzzed" when I wrote this (whatever that means).

C'mon! Laugh with me! At least crack a small smile.

You're right. We're all morons and should give up on life.

But seriously, I know I've still got things to learn in life. Does that make me a moron? Well, tell me this. Do you call a 6-year-old a moron because he doesn't know multiplication, yet? Or maybe the 2-year-old is a moron because he doesn't know not to cross the street without looking for cars, yet. Because that's what I'm getting out of that: that we're morons because we're still in the process of learning.

And to Bo, don't tell me that I don't know what I want. Just because I might no longer want something tomorrow doesn't mean I don't want it now. Let's not confuse "want" with "need".

Umm, no, we shouldn't give up on life because we're morons. We have merely to acknowledge that we're not the shiznit we once thought we were. It's that simple. Humility and wisdom.

Your arguments are beside the point. A 6-year old who doesn't know multiplication, that's academic. It's a matter of being told simple facts and then remembering them. We're talking about real life experiences here, which is an entirely different ball game.

The point is that you're a moron regardless of anything. That's never going to change. You're not God, and you never will be. You're some guy who came out of a woman's womb, was a helpless baby completely at the mercy of your environment, and you're in the process of growing up. I'm in the process of growing up. I'm not as wise as I could be. Not as humble as I should be. Not as righteous as I desire to be. This stuff has nothing to do with academic learning by rote. If it did, we could all attain perfection just by getting a solid education.

Does any of this mean that I'm better than you because I'm older? No. It means that you suck, I suck, we all suck in our own unique ways.

Here's a simple truth. This life you're living... you don't know what you're doing. You want me to believe that you know what you're doing because it makes you look good. I've spent a majority of my life believing that everyone else knows what they're doing and I'm the only one in the world who doesn't have a clue what he's doing. I tend to believe that everyone around me is smarter and better than me. I figured out that if I look like I know what I'm doing, I won't draw any undue attention. Even if I'm scared to death on the inside, if I look like I know what I'm doing on the outside, I blend in. The problem is that I have to consciously remind myself that this is true of everyone around me as well. No one knows what they're doing.

Perhaps my choice of words is too harsh. Moron. Idiot. Loser. Perhaps I should rather say that we're all trying our best to deal with life in our own ways, and we're all operating at different levels based on our environment and personal experience. Like I said at the onset, your experience is different from mine. And broad generalizations aren't a good way to describe things. Grain of salt. In other words, you're not perfect, and I really don't know what I'm talking about.

I choose not to believe how you put it. Why? It's the most pessimistic bullsh*t I've ever read. All you say is pretty much hide in the corner, never truly believe in yourself and just hope to scrape by. It's all weak, and in my opinion, the worst, most stupid way to live.