(779.) My Vow 5:45 PM - 5:58 PM 05/31/07
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Please don't make me go
I want to stay and help them
Every last one
Let me be reborn again
So I can help more
Don't make me just die out
This candle will burn forever
If you let it
PLEASE
Let it
They are not meaningless
Because I give them meaning
I have no authority
But here,
hold my hand
I will let you know
I am real
You are real
We are real
You are not alone
You are unique
Why?
because you have me
You deserve more
But I can't give you more
I give you all that I have
Oh
Do you not understand?
You're not just another fun for me
You are a purpose
A reason
And I would like to be your reason
You are special
I will not ask for more than I need
I will not disrespect your gifts by taking less than you offer
But I will spread your gifts to others
I will not drink of the cup of lust
No matter how much my body craves it
I will only crave you
Who you are
I don't know
BUT I LIVE FOR YOU
And I realize
that you may not live for me


I will falter
But not on purpose
And when I trip
I will not fall
I will recollect and move on
Head high
I will be proud of who I am
I will be ashamed of my actions
But I will be proud of my apologies
of the lessons I learn
Of my actions to prevent more mistakes
But I will make them
And I will apologize
and I will learn
I wish happiness
For you
and everyone else
because we all deserve it
because I say so
but I know I hold no more bearing
than you
or anyone else for that matter
but that doesn't make what I proclaim
any less important
This goes to those to be born
this goes to those born
this goes to those reborn
unborn
and those who are no longer able to have the word born used about them
I will do something that matters
I will make life better
For all of you
I will honor your memories
I will help you build new memories
I will help
I will do
good
And I will love
I will love everyone
But more so
I will love someone
Very special
I wonder what her name will be
And someday I hope to come back to this
And put her name in this hole
I LOVE ___________
This is my proclamation
My creed
My holy text
Full of egotistical babble
I swear my life by these words
I swear my soul on these words
I sign my heart in this poem
I will love you
I will hold you to let you know we are real
I will give meaning where there is none
I will think where there is no thought
And I will never let anyone get lost in the change
Here is my hand
In peace
In civility
In hopes
In dreams
In marriage
In yours
Let's work together
To do
good

I read "My Vow".

And what'd you think?

Really long.
779th?
Wow.

Good Job.

Creatively it sounded as though it was from the heart and flowed pretty well. I especially liked, "I will not ask for more than I need...(up until)...But I will spread your gifts to others"

I must admit that I am a little frustrated at how much loving someone else means to you. I think you best exmeplified this as

"I LOVE ________"

which to me means that the object of your love is really not that important (you don't even know her name) but as the title "My Vow" admits, the subjective climax is "I LOVE" which is what is really important.

So do I respect the work: yes

Can I use it as a basis in my own life: only minimally

It's not really loving someone else is so important.
It's finding a match for me. And she will be special for reasons other than written in this poem. This poem is written in response to existential depression that a lot of my peers seem to suffer from. I will write individual poems singing praises of who I fall for, but this poem shows that I'm willing to give my everything to someone. I don't know who, but someday someone special will come and I will build shrines to that person. But they have to be VERY special to deserve that.

OK, but by your vow, it seems as though you are requiring your match to handle the amount of love that you want to give her. In other words, if she doesn't want your 'everything' or 'shrines' why vow to her prematurely. So it seems like if it is about matchmaking, you are advertising that your match needs to enable you to severly love her.

BUT I LIVE FOR YOU
And I realize
that you may not live for me


I think that sums up my argument pretty well.

But how is that consistent with:

Ah, how appropriate, Alto. If only more people in the world thought of love in this way.

Loving someone else is very important, but it's the person that is important to me, not the idea of the person.

Then how do you know how you are going to vow to her until you know who she is?

the idea... as far as i can tell... isn't supposed to be about a specific person. it's about the love that alt has to give. it's like... a place in his heart that's reserved? you know? for someone that just hasn't come along yet.

the poem, seems to me, is more about the heart space, and the wanting to love someone... really.. than the person. which it can't really be about because she's not around yet.

a tambourine person. *sigh*

I think that is what I have been trying to get at in my posts. I wonder if you are saying it in a way that I am not such that he agrees with you but disagrees with me. I'm unclear on the distinction.

EDIT: If there is such a person, that person might not want to be loved the way he wants to love her. From that point of view if he is going to love her in HIS way instead of the way SHE wants to be loved, I am asserting that she is nothing more than an object to him. Something that is objectified.

EDIT EDIT: Another way of saying it is if it is TRULY THE PERSON that is important to him, he can't possibly make a vow of love to her until she exists. Other wise it seems that he can make a vow of love to an idea of a person. Then he can look for the person to fulfill his idea, whereas the idea is more important because the people have to fit it rather than the idea fit the person. That is what I am trying to say.

your tone sounds more questioning, as if you're critical (though not aggressively so, more... curiously so). but of course when you're asked a question, you tend to restate your point of view.

in all honesty, i thought you were asking him if he'd noticed an inconsistency in his thinking there. which is probably the way he took it, which would explain his differing reactions.

I am not so much trying to assert that he is being inconsistent per se.

I am moreso trying to clarify that his vow seems to be inherently doing a lot for him as it is allowing him to express his love as he sees fit, but that from a non-Altoecko perspective of 'love', it might not be properly considerd 'loving' of an actual person, if the actual person has no opportunity to actually muse-ically impress him.

EDIT: It therefore seems from THAT point of view to be loving of an IDEAL person or not ACTUALLY loving.

Sumisem said it pretty well, this poem is more so a proclamation saying that if need be, I will give my everything. I will give just as much love as my lover wants the day that I find her. Giving too much will drown her affection and can lead to all sorts of things. Another way to look at this poem: "Hello, I'm trying to do good in the world, these are some mistakes I make and how I'll rectify them. I'm looking for a hand to hold and if need be I give you my everything, I'll spend my life looking for you, whoever this particular poem is written for. If you think that person is you, why not speak up? Hopefully my soul will let me know if it really is you, and if it doesn't then I'll still try my best." I hope that gives an adequate enough answer....if it doesn't I'll try again.

2 things:

1. Would it be fair to say that while this vow is a proclamation it is not necessarily an actual act of loving? If this is an unfair statement, than who is actually being loved by this act?

2. You say that giving too much love can drown affections and lead to all sorts of things. This addresses that you apparently don't have to give her all your love even though you are vowing now, so I understand that you at least are willing and ready to do so if she wants. I think that I understand that. Your statement, however, might also suggest that you are the one determining how much love she should get (so as not to lose her affection, etc.). Is your vow saying too that if she wants you to love her so much that you have to give up yourself (maybe your life) to make her happy, but once you do she decides she no longer has affection for how you are 'too' loving that she decides to leave you, that this is how you would have it as you are giving her ALL that she wants?

look, as it is, yeah - he's loving an apparation. an ideal. a person that doesn't exist yet, just exists in his mind. he's making this vow to her, in hopes that one day she might exist. it's hopes not laws.

now if he say meets someone who isn't EXACTLY this person and they fall in love - just because she doesn't fit the pre-defined ideals in the poem doesn't mean she is the wrong person. the poem doesn't have to dictate his life or love. if he meets the right person and knows it he can write a new one and love her just the way she wants to be loved - and even still that's giving all he can for her. when she exists he'll know what she wants. so the main idea of doing his best and giving his all to be what she needs is still relevant. the great thing about ideas is that they're varient and so all the little details can change at will. a person isn't stuck to an idea the minute they have it. a tambourine person is just a shape, and can change. it's fragile, you break it to form something new.

Well I sort of agree with you but he did say


So that makes me think he doesn’t agree with you because I interpret this to mean that regardless of how important the person actually is, the IDEA of the person is NOT important (by this statement). He's not saying they are both important (the person and the idea). He is saying that one is and the other is not. Is that too literal of me, AltoEcko?

But I don’t necessarily agree with you regarding:



because if that is the case, how good of a VOW is it?