Hello all,

Well, I been very busy lately. Ever since TAI started his externship I been rather lonely and depressed. I got very use to him coming home early and going out on the town with me during the week. The good news is that his externship has ended and now hes back to just going to school in the morning.

Because of my depression I spoke to my therapist. She recommended group
therapy classes. I said, "Hows that going to help?" She said,"Theres a program we have here that you come to class at 9am and stay until 3pm and you get an hour for lunch and we pick you up and bring you home. It maybe good for you to get out of your house being you don't drive and you wait for your husband to get you out of the house." So I'm giving this thing a try. I never really got along with people face to face. And it will be kinda like going to a nut house. I will see what happens..

Today was my first day at the classes. 9am and 2pm is a homeroom class.
In the homeroom class you get to know your "home" group on a personal
level. Kinda like how we chat here at the mag about our lives.
At 10am we have a group study on how to deal with depression. At 11am we read about mental health issues and learn how to cope with stuff. At 12pm is lunch time. And at 1pm theres an art class..
It's kinda like going to camp or something. For the first 2 weeks they want me to go there 5 days a week so I can get to know people. Then I can drop it down to 3 days a week. But we will see what happens. I may or may not stick with this.

People there are quite fruity. I see this one guy who needs to whisper to him self every time he talks to someone else.
And a girl who's always crying, tears pouring down her face because she thinks shes ugly. She walks in there everyday like that. No matter how many times you tell her shes pretty. So its some kinda illness. I know I'm not that bad off and I don't really need to be in a place like that. Sigh.. We will see.

In other news...
My parents told Me and TAI that if we can fix up the above ground basement on their rental property here in PA that, TAI can use it as a computer repair shop. YEY! *CLAPS*

It needs a lot of TLC. Theres a bad leak. Every time it rains we get a 1 inch puddle that floods half the basement. Being we did not know where the leak was coming from we decided to throw powdered cool-aid on the walls. As soon as the powder hit the corner of the one wall the cool-aid turned bight red and then we knew thats where the problem is coming from. So we bought "dry lock" and where painting it on the wall. Where going to need to get a dehumidifier. Some of the stone walls are crumbling. And were string up more lights to see in there.

There's tons of pipes that makes it not to nice to look at. So my mom said for me to paint them a dark blue. Then to make the walls yellow and the trimming dark blue to match the pipes. To give it a matching decor. We going with Best buy colors I guess. lol
So every day now in the evenings we have been devoting 2 hours to fixing
up this project.

I'm very much missing my time here on the mag. And waking up early and feeling sleepy all day until they let us crazies out is not easy for me. But I can at least say things are looking more positive for the time being.

As far as the court thing for me.. I faxed in many papers to binder& binder
and there going to send paper work for me to hand my doctor's to fill out.
I have no idea if I'm keeping my Oct 11th court date or not. I'm a bit on egg shells because my other attorney's office is still waiting to hear back from me as I'm being held up by this new office.

And that's what's been going on. Hope your all doing well.

-Kitty

Wow... that's alot more than what's going on with me. I go to work... I go home. Heh.

Anyway, I wish you the best of luck through your toils. And you don't have to worry, the Mag will be here reguardless if you are absent or not. At least, I'd like to think. ^_^

That's quite some stuff you've got going on there. Do the people working at that center at least acknowledge that you aren't mental?

Hey KittyKicker!

Wow. That sounds like a lot to deal with at the same time.

The program that you're involved in sounds very interesting. Maybe you could at least be an encouragement to some of the other people participating there, seeing as they have some really severe issues to deal with, it appears.

That's cool that you guys have permission to have the computer office at home. I hope you'll be able to get things in order as far as the leak goes.

It's always good to see you on here. I hope the time away will be something really beneficial for you.

Not to be a cynic here (but actually that is exactly what I'm being), but are you really going to benefit from fixing up your parents rental property? How long will you be guaranteed to use it? Will it be worth the money now and will you have anything that you'll have to pay in the future to continue to use it?

@Dray- I have met some more normal people today. But it seems theres only a small hand full of us that are what they call "high functioning" people there. This one girl I kinda feel worried for. She seems like she feels alot of the same feelings I do. But yet shes going to be starting shock therapy. So I'm kinda scared for her.
I really don't understand how shock therapy helps people.
I think its down right strange. I'm not the type of person to stick my finger in a socket every time I do something wrong. Why do people need this shock stuff? I have no idea.

@BO- My folks thought this would be good so we will be free and clear of paying rent. My folks don't plan on moving out this way at least for a few years. My folks are paying us 50.00 a month to mow the lawn and collect the rent payments. Being where already the care takers of the property it will make it easier for us to keep an eye on things.

From what I understand we will just need to pay for power and cable to run the lights and computers.

Yes, it's money out of our pockets to fix up the place. But if you think about it.. Even if we where to pay rent on a place we would still need to buy things for it and make it right for an office space. At least with this we are rent free. And we can start as soon as we get it done.

@Lantis and Pagerron- Thank you for your supporting comments.

*Kitty is blessed to have you as her friends*

Well, I was going to link to a Wiki article about it, but it's way too long. Maybe somebody else here can explain shock therapy to those of us who haven't taken psychology classes.

I gave up the therapy classes like I knew I would. TAI is now home all the time because his extern is over. And I need to get things done regarding my court case and fixing the basement cleaning my home.

I will be going to TAI cousin's wedding on Sept. 2nd. So I got to get ready for that. Well at least theres good news.

Shock therapy is used as a reinforcer, as it's known in the psychological realm. Positive reinforcement is praising when one does something good in order for them to continue doing that something good. Negative reinforcement is dealing punishment for doing something wrong and trying to weed out the problem. At least, I think what I said was correct.

Anyhow, the shock therapy is used as a tool to make one not one to do something bad or continue carrying bad thoughts. It causes you pain and you don't want to feel that pain, so you choose to do the opposite of what you were doing. That's the point of it, though it doesn't work on everyone, but does for most.

^ Hmm But the pain is being caused by going for shock therapy... I'm having trouble under standing whats going to stop someone from.. lets say stealing. When they know the pain was caused by the therapy and not by the item they are taking.

Like we all know not to stick your hand in the fire. But if the fire only lies at the hospital that you got the therapy, how will it still effect you somewhere else?

I would just be afraid to go back for more therapy.