I've been gone for quite an awful long time. Don't expect anyone to remember me, but that's cool n' all.

It's been quite a ride for the recent times. I've dumped the ex-(obviously), with her remarks about this and that, and how she pretty much played me. That was a while back, but dang, it sure does STILL tick me off. I feel embarrassed I ever made an engagement post(as pointless as it was, since she was sleeping with another guy two months later and a flailing relationship and ... just dang.) And then a whole lot of other mess happened since I wasn't quite sure of how to proceed from there- at all. On one end, you have a girl you've dated for 5 years telling you that "you're her only friend", this and that- and I clearly state that I made some horrible choices in that 4 month period, and hurt folks. And that is something that I feel pretty darn bad about to this day, and try to amend for everyday that I can. I've felt pretty crappy ever since stopping my regular posting at the mag, to be honest entirely.

At any rate, I've been living in Kentucky now. I have to say, in difference to PA and OH... holy crap. Some people down here are super-bigoted. I mean, I guess I can't be surprised, but it's just discouraging. I felt like I was the only hispanic person in my high school; however, I'm living with someone here that has their family make racist jokes quite often. She doesn't condone it, but it's still just... crappy. I guess, depressing is the best word to use here, since they say they don't "mean it", but it still comes across.

I graduated from school(no doubt man!) HOWEVER, I think I had the internship advisor from hell. Her gossip spread far and wide(I'm sure she gossiped about her interns too somehow), and she was on vacation for a good part of the internship. I had it from May 20th to July 20th that summer, and I think she took off 2 weeks in total. It was in Cincinnati, and while I like that city, I really did NOT like my internship because of it. The girl that gave me "training" was basically on Facebook most of the day, and never got crap for it or anything. She didn't know how to use Photoshop- I did- hence, I got to be the Magazine's(lol irony to the worst extent) bus boy essentially. If they needed a photo edited, etc. I loved the actual work, but not the people so much. I got treated like crap of course because I was an intern, as dumb of an idea as it was. I could do much more than assigned. The magazine had nothing I could NOT do, but as dumb as it was, I got relegated to copy/translating to text older issues. I completed my credit hours and told the upper person of mine(the gossip) that I had fulfilled my hours. She responded in kind with a half-hearted "You lost your summer, so it's great that you met your hours and can have some vacation left". It was a bullcrap response from her. She ended up giving my adviser back at my college a report of "Hard-worker, got projects done but left too early as stated by contract" to me and my contract had said 240 hours, or a certain date( I reached 250 hours). And by the end, they were giving me busy work. My higher up at the internship was nice to my face, but blasted me for that in a review to my college.

Since then, I've been caretaking mainly. A person very close to me's mother has had a stroke a couple years back, so she needs extra care. Her father also is beginning to suffer from Dementia, and also Parkinson's Disease. Ironically enough, I'm mainly caretaking in the more basic of duties(cleaning, dish-washing, and the like) while their daughter takes them to multiple doctor's appointments. I'm trying to stay upbeat, but I've also lost a ton of friends from college(from them being classist, racist, and homophobic.) Some guy that was after me in college and discredited me at every turn got a girlfriend. I was happy, until I realized she was... pretty much an ass. She spat on welfare, race, etc(even using racial slurs and defending that) until I finally got sick of her crap an called her out on it. Cue much wank, much anger on her part, etc. I ended up just saying eff it to the people in college(who had basically justified racism especially in their own little Pennsylvanian minds anyhow) and decided to move on.

I'm 24 now, and ready to rock. I find myself in a similar situation to high school now(not too many friends, etc) to an extent, but I'm working on working out and trying to get past the idiots I had come across in college. I started a youtube channel of Let's Plays(maybe moreso playthrough's since those same people from college told me I have a "12-year-old-boy voice" so I'm pretty insecure about voicing my LPs), and trying my best to caretake and such. I'm also working on working out towards my goal weight, and I've been fast-food free for about half a year or so.

This place has been one of the best places to post in my past(which is all not that long ago), and I'm glad for that. I've realized I have some anxiety issues though, and I apologize retrospectively for not keeping contact as well as I should have. There's some awesome OTC remedies for that, however. so I feel much better these days.

How have you all been? I feel ashamed to have been gone so long. I think I had some serious growing up to do, and there is no time like the present to show yourself where you went wrong, and how. Currently, I'm working on my artistic abilities and my graphic design ones to find a good job.

OMG you live! How could we forget you? I had sort of assumed you'd been married and ran off into a life of all that or something... Very wrong o_o <3 welcome back, in any state of life. Do you plan to hang around?

'Good to know that. At least it would appear you are attempting to make something good of your life in spite of seeming recent dead-ends.



And of course we did not forget you, Miss Fayorei.

For me, anyway, it would be hard to forget the girl with an avatar of one of my most-loved Final Fantasy characters, who I also once promised to slay a mighty beast (because he had once humiliated her in a certain SNES action RPG) on behalf of. ... If you happen to remember that. ^_^

I kinda laughed at the married thing. Not because of some ire with it, but just the sheer fact of where things are at right now. Recently, because of debt collectors calling me- I found out my mother had uh, kinda charged up $6000 in debt while I was in school or so. She lost her job at the beginning of my senior year, and hid it from me. So, I began getting calls and she finally spilled the beans. I felt bad for her to an extent, less so when I found part of these bills was a $1000 QVC bill. I'm still trying to work on picking up those pieces, and I'm down to negotiating the last two to be removed from my credit report with a settlement. It was kind of a decision to move permanently down here to Kentucky since I really, really love my current situation away from the toxicity at home; however, it's made me resentful to even visit home really. It'd just be awkward I think, and I feel like I'm taking care of a child that's 46, much less being equipped for other stuff. Hopefully though, she will learn and change from this.

I'll be around I think. Though it wasn't quite an auspicious start today since I've had a stomach flu all day and have been mainly resting and sleeping.



I think a dead end just doesn't cut it for me, since I thought when I was younger I'd already had hit them judging on my geographical location. So hopefully, I can just break through these and the job market somehow and get something. Southern Kentucky doesn't have too much in the way of jobs I'd truly, truly want, but it's nice being able to breathe a ton better with my asthma.

And as for the second part.

I read some where that there are 11 social/philosophical/political regions in the United States. The main problem with the ones in south are that they either are to wrapped up in individualistic freedom, or are just plain insular from a "Us vs. THEM" perspective. (Flat out Xenophobic is too strong a word here, FYI.) This stems from the fact that the type of people who settled there desired privacy, and freedom from "governmental oppression." The Idea that a man is his own king and that one must constantly defend that which he holds dear, kind of holds sway. So if you are your own king and someone ELSE tells you that you need to make room for some new person or idea, it's gonna chafe the HELL out of you. This is why most southerners are the way they are.

I'm from Maine, and while the state is chock full of rednecks and hillbillies, at least they are TOLERANT rednecks and hillbillies. Every where is going to have douche-bags with narrow minds and wide mouths, but there are fewer here than most places.

I know it can be tough when people are being right asses to you, but you can take solace in the fact that they are lesser for it and if you choose to persevere and dismiss the static you'll be all the better, and more importantly, better than them. Haters gonna hate.

Very true! I don't usually get bothered at all(I just hear the racial/sex jokes and kind of roll my eyes when that happens). It's amazingly not that bad, I think there was definitely a more toxic environment at my college, and that was in Pennsylvania of all places.

A good part of my dad's side's immediate family is in Georgia right now. They're pretty awesome people, so I figure like you said it's not always a regional thing. There will be nice people and jerks everywhere you go.

The high road is always the best road, however. Which is why I just didn't say anything when my roommate's family(a small part of it) makes mainly racial jokes. You gotta choose your battles, I figure, and then proceed.

Ah, welcome back, Goten.

Thanks, Bon.

Welcome back, Ash. It's been a long time.

I suppose we've both grown a great deal since the last time we talked. Feel free to message me here or AIM me (truereddragoon) if you want to catch up.

What's your youtube username?

I think I have quite a bit(feels like that went too fast, I blame that last year of school from other junk). But it is quite a blessing to hear that from you. My AIM is RubiKnights, just thought I'd let you know since it's a far-out there name.



OrangeGamerAlpha. There isn't much on there yet, and I dunno if I'll talk(maybe eventually, if I get an okayish mic? No clue!) NAme's based on Earthbound from the PSI ______ alpha spell.=D

Little secret: Everyone hates their voices. I really can't stand the way I sound either. You should still grab a mic sometime. If it would make you feel any better, I'd be glad to jump on Skype and co-comment with you for a while until you are used to the idea of talking. Think of it like when we used to play Left 4 Dead on XBLA.

Just throwing that out there.

Haha, well thanks! Right now I have a set of the $26-30ish Logitech headphones with a mic attached. May give it a shot sometime.

Hey, welcome back!
To an extent, I think I can relate to what you've gone through. Good to see you have some goals to keep your mind busy.

Bout your lets play, I think I sound like crap, But I lets play any way. My laptop has built in mic and so I use that. It's balanced fairly well as I'm sure you can agree.

Thanks! I hope it was some of the good parts you can relate to. I would wish no one through some of the stuff that happened.

Keeping the mind busy is key! Drawing is my absolute favorite way to relax, though, I've been doing a lot of reading with my girlfriend(she gets a book, I read it after usually). Try to read stuff together(she does book blogs and all that), and I have to say, it's refreshing to do it again. I've always liked it in high school/college, but having some direction on what to read is nice since it's not my forte. I'm also going to be trying to brush up on Japanese(I ended up taking 3 years in college), but I am very, very lacking on Kanji and a couple other areas.

In addition, I just bought RPG Maker XP. I know I'm behind the curve there on the PC makers, but VX seemed okayish at best. VX Ace looks great, but Enterbrain has said thus far retail will be $90. Seems Ace fixes a lot of the VX pitfalls from what I'm reading, though. And they're going to do a decent amount of discount promotions apparently.



I didn't know you had LPs! Do you have a link?

I have the headset, but I'll probably research some mic shielding and stuff if I use the headset. I'm probably being picky, but it's okay I figure. I may try my Macbook's built-in mic, I hear that's pretty good as well.

Heyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! !

IT'S YOU!

How are you?!:D

It IS you, but where did you come from O_O *checks the floorboards and wall panels*

I just wish he'd stick around. =/