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PostPosted: February 17th, 2008, 6:08 pm 
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Source:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/scotland/gla ... 095134.stm

Quote:
Bike sex man placed on probation

Cleaners caught Mr Stewart simulating sex with a bike

A man caught trying to have sex with his bicycle has been sentenced to three years on probation.

Robert Stewart, 51, admitted a sexually aggravated breach of the peace by conducting himself in a disorderly manner and simulating sex.

Sheriff Colin Miller also placed Stewart on the Sex Offenders Register for three years.

Mr Stewart was caught in the act with his bicycle by cleaners in his bedroom at the Aberley House Hostel in Ayr.

Gail Davidson, prosecuting, told Ayr Sheriff Court: "They knocked on the door several times and there was no reply.

"They used a master key to unlock the door and they then observed the accused wearing only a white t-shirt, naked from the waist down.

"The accused was holding the bike and moving his hips back and forth as if to simulate sex."

Both cleaners, who were "extremely shocked", told the hostel manager who called police.

Sheriff Colin Miller told Stewart: "In almost four decades in the law I thought I had come across every perversion known to mankind, but this is a new one on me. I have never heard of a 'cycle-sexualist'."

Stewart had denied the offence, claiming it was caused by a misunderstanding after he had too much to drink.

The bachelor had been living in the hostel since October 2006 after moving from his council house in Girvan.

He now lives in Ayr.


And the question is: if the guy was locked in the room not disturbing anyone, how is that a "sexually aggravated breach of the peace"?


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PostPosted: February 17th, 2008, 6:22 pm 
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And the real question is: Was he THAT desperate?

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PostPosted: February 17th, 2008, 7:51 pm 
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He was. Hilarious


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PostPosted: February 17th, 2008, 8:23 pm 
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i think because it was a hostal that is why they could do this, though it does seem like a tremendous breach of privacy and not at all public sex. i think the guy just wanted the whole incident to go away rather then drag it out.

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PostPosted: February 17th, 2008, 10:44 pm 
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Sorta like how people do beastiality, but never get caught. So it makes it legal.


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PostPosted: February 17th, 2008, 11:06 pm 
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Yeah, but with beastialty, the animal is most likely hurt.

It's not like the guy physically or mentally damaged his bike.

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PostPosted: February 18th, 2008, 12:08 am 
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oh, yeah.

heh, heard about this ages ago... it was roflsome.

BBC news turns up the most amazing stuff, seriously. ^__^


... tbh, though, i think it goes a bit far to be calling it sex.


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PostPosted: February 18th, 2008, 12:46 am 
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Wait a second... a bike... not even motorized... how the hell did he even have sex with it? On second thought, I don't want to know. :|

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PostPosted: February 18th, 2008, 1:25 am 
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one word.

spokes.

=O


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PostPosted: February 18th, 2008, 1:16 pm 
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I see no problem with a man showing some love to his bike.
I think its really stupid. They sell sex toys in the adult shops. I'm sure if the guy got cought making love to a plastic blow up doll this whole thing would be different.

It's stupid. It's not even sex. Its masterbation using an object that is non-living.

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PostPosted: February 18th, 2008, 6:40 pm 
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I dont think beastiality hurts the animal...


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PostPosted: February 18th, 2008, 7:55 pm 
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^ It's more likely to hurt the human. =O

And...

Regal wrote:
one word.

spokes.

=O


Damn you! Why do you make me go to the dictionary that much?!

*after consulting the aforementioned dictionary*

...

... eew.


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PostPosted: February 19th, 2008, 12:05 am 
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Friggin foreigners.

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PostPosted: February 19th, 2008, 12:43 am 
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A bike? He should've went with a tree or something.


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PostPosted: February 19th, 2008, 11:55 am 
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^

One word.

Splinters.

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PostPosted: February 19th, 2008, 7:09 pm 
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^

One word.

GIRL!

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PostPosted: February 19th, 2008, 7:19 pm 
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The Gnasher wrote:
^ It's more likely to hurt the human. =O

And...

Regal wrote:
one word.

spokes.

=O


Damn you! Why do you make me go to the dictionary that much?!

*after consulting the aforementioned dictionary*

...

... eew.

*Also consults dictionary*
Oh. You know, I thought the same as Regal, even tho I didn't know it's name. Not even on my own :|

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PostPosted: February 19th, 2008, 9:42 pm 
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Jamos wrote:
Wait a second... a bike... not even motorized... how the hell did he even have sex with it? On second thought, I don't want to know. :|


but seriously... maybe he took some parts off or something to make it possible.

you know, maybe he stripped it.


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PostPosted: February 19th, 2008, 9:43 pm 
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:drums:


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